005: FORCE AND FLOW

What is flow anyway?

Flow.

To go with the flow.

I can't help but notice that, in many of my past episodes I seem to come back to this flow, the idea that we are one with the flow or that there's some kind of flow that we are coming home to or constantly being a part of. But then I stop and feel like I have to go deeper into this and talk my way

out of it

into it

through it

a bit more.

Because I stand at the risk of otherwise just being another voice handing you these meaningless platitudes without any way of actually connecting to it in a way that is meaningful on a personal level. So, in this episode I would like to describe my own experiences with force and flow.

Forcing and flowing.

These can be seen as some kind of opposites, but as we have learned so far, these opposites have more in common than we might at first think. Sometimes I feel like we have to go through a period of time of forcing and pushing our way through something in order to be able to finally

Surrender.

To surrender to flow.

At least that has been my own experience. I'm a stubborn person who likes to, or maybe not likes to, but, uses their own force. Who learned that that's how you get things done. You use your energy. You use your force. For better and for worse.

I've come up against many walls. I pushed through some walls, anyway. Or I took steps back. I had to retrace my steps. I had to find my way around it, or accept that this was a wall that wasn't meant to be destroyed. It was a wall that helped me go back to the flow, or it was a part of the flow in itself.

In Star Wars, the cute little creature called Yoda is telling Luke Skywalker, the hero of the story, to use the force. But we find out that using the force isn't as straightforward as it seems, because using the force is also connected to some kind of a flow.

Allowing to be a channel for the force, instead of forcing it.

And when practicing Tai Chi, I was introduced to the concept of Chi or Ki. That concept also connects to this flow. It is the force of life life force energy that is flowing, that we are channeling, in different ways.

The concept of flow is also something I was introduced to through game design.

I haven't shared that much about myself and my background on this podcast and it's intentional, because I want to, well, let it flow out. I am using more of my channeling sides for this or maybe I am allowing myself to be something else or something more open than just the human made categories that we attach to ourselves.

So, in this podcast I am still is human, but I am allowing myself to speak from a different place than only that. But also from that.

Well for now, I'll tell you that I studied first computer game graphics, creating visuals for games and then I also studied a masters where I was trying to explore how to use the games medium for creating more aesthetic experiences, focusing on the atmosphere, but also, I did learn somegame design principles. And one central principle is this idea of flow. The game designers want to create an experience where the player experiences flow. So, the experience exists in the flow channel. Funny, the channel...recreating a channel to channel the flow.

But of course, this connects to the psychological concept of flow, so when you are in flow you are immersed in something because you are so enjoying it and in the flow channel. That's where you are when there is a perfect balance of challenge and ease, or enjoyment. That you're able to meet the challenge, and that creates the flow sensation where you want to keep going. You're flowing with it.

And then, when I think of my life and life overall with these concepts, force and flow, I recognize that there are these challenges, and there need to be these challenges. There need to be, at least for me, these time periods where I go and hit my head hard against a wall. so I learn, “oh, there was a wall here”, or “oh, that's how that feels” and then I can adjust my direction and that's a part of the flow for me and maybe it's milder for some people. Hopefully.

But for me, I finally felt like I came to understand, or feel a deeper sense of flow when I incorporated this forcing or this challenge more into it and I accept that flow isn't just ease and it's not meant to be. It's like it's life, it flows, it goes.

As humans we experience it in a certain direction. We move forward, we experience time, most often. Maybe it changes if you are using some kind of medication or meditation. Then your concept of time might be adjusted, but we are moving forward on this river of life in the flow, regardless. But our experience gains meaning from all the different types of experiences and, how could we understand the flow, how could we understand the ease (when it takes the form of ease) if we hadn't experienced the challenges?

And how could I have learned to surrender, if I hadn't pushed my head against that wall?Over and over again and until I understood that, “No, that doesn't work. I can't force this. I have to surrender, and in this case, go with the flow.”

And go with the flow again another concept that is widely used, but can mean many different things. Maybe sometimes go with the flow means that you need to go through an experience that is really tough. You have to go through it, you have to push through it and that's how the flow is like. This part of the river of your life is just wild, with sharp rocks and you're in your small boat and you just have to use your force to stay afloat and push through and you learn something in the process and then after that, maybe the river changes, calms down, and you can surrender and rest in it, or maybe when you are fighting your way in your wild river, you already then understand that “oh, if I take a different approach the river itself changes”.

I guess this is why it's so difficult to talk about force and flow: because on one level I believe that the type of energy we give out to the world is also what we will receive, that the world functions like a huge three-dimensional mirror. This wasn't a concept invented by me, I've taken part in it in many books and other talkers, podcasters. Particularly I can recommend looking into Reality Transurfing, regarding this concept.

But if we have this idea that our energy gets mirrored back at us it still doesn't completely remove all challenges Just because we feel ourselves giving out some kind of a mild loving energy it doesn't automatically mean that that's all we're gonna get and honestly, after I read that book (Reality Transurfing steps I-V by Vadim Zeland) and trying to do these exercises, or focusing my energy and doing it in a certain way, it still didn't transform everything at once.

And then I come back to the whole idea of all these different levels of our consciousness and the reason for this whole podcast, that, while on some level I really wanted to experience a flow and move on, on some other vaster, or deeper, or "soul-level", I didn't want to just flow easily and go. I wanted to struggle. I wanted to suffer and get experience through that. So, on some subconscious or unconscious levels, maybe the purpose of my experience here, of my existence (was that) there were things I needed to learn through those experiences.

They’re still part of the whole, but I couldn't force ease to come into my life just by trying to create it with my mind. Because, my mind that I can consciously use is just a small part of the whole, and there are other sides, other parts of me. The subconscious, which I can connect to. Which I can look into, if I am aiming my attention in that direction. And the unconscious which might simply hold mysteries that are not for me to uncover. Are not for me to be revealed.

So, what more should we say about force and flow? I feel like I'm just creating more question marks and that's maybe partly a purpose of this podcast: Allowing there to be these question marks. Being fascinated about the complexities of existence and the different layers and levels and letting them exist. These paradoxes and opposites and connections between them.

Force...

We all have force.

We all can use our force the way that Luke and all the other Jedis did. Or we can all channel our life energy, our chi, and we can flow.

Yeah, that is the dance.

This beautiful mysterious dance of life.

And we need to use our energy to do what our soul calls us how to do, I think, because why else would we be here in this human form, being alive, if we didn't want to physically do something?

But then in the question of what that something is, what we should do, there might be a hint somewhere deeper, somewhere vaster, that can help us to direct that energy.

But maybe we can't look in, or listen in to those hints before we're in a state where we're ready to receive them. When we're ready to surrender.

We need to struggle a bit, because that's also a process of learning. It's not easy, or doesn't have to be. Maybe it can be.

Again, this is me expressing my experiences, and it might look very different for you and you know best how your life flows. How you want it to flow and how to channel your own energy. You know, deep inside.

So, maybe we can end this episode with leaving a space for that.

To consider, what experiences have you had where you have used your force, and just tried to push through something?

Did you succeed in what you were striving for? Did you not?

What did you learn from that?

And when have you experienced this flow of ease? How did you arrive at that?

And what came after that then?

I think it's very natural for us to strive for this ease, this flow, but sometimes I feel like, if I am only aiming my attention at that ease, that flow, I might miss out on all the precious jewels of wisdom, the treasures, that I did pick up, that I did take with me, through the struggles and through the suffering, and that, maybe those experiences are also part of the flow.

They paved my way for surrendering to

whatever energy I’m in.

And paved my way for recognizing

when I am in the flow.